Chemistry Jokes

A chemistry teacher was scholding her students for not learning the Periodic Table of the Elements. She said, "Why when I was your age I knew both their names and weights." One kid popped up, "Yeah, but teach, there were so few of them back then."

'H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water'

Q: Why are chemists great for solving problems?

A: They have all the 'solutions'.

A physicist, biologist and a chemist were going to the ocean for the first time.
The physicist saw the ocean and was fascinated by the waves. He said he wanted to do some research on the fluid dynamics of the waves and walked into the ocean. Obviously, he was drowned and never returned.
The biologist said he wanted to do research on the flora and fauna inside the ocean and walked inside the ocean. He too, never returned.
The chemist waited for a long time and afterwards, wrote the observation, "The physicist and the biologist are soluble in ocean water".

Teacher: 'What is the formula for water?'

Student: 'H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O'

Teacher: 'That's not what I taught you'.

Student: 'But you said the formula for water was...H to O.'

"My name is Bond - Covalent Bond."